Feeling a bit better

Somehow, without taking a nap, I feel more energised.

I sipped some rosehip tea.  Started reading the chapters that seemed relevant to me,  in “Nervous Breakdown” by Jenny Cozens, which was quite a few, apart from ageing!  Felt like most of the conditions actually overlap, like anxiety, depression, OCDs, there’s some familiar root in a way.  Like something happened in your childhood or life that causes this reaction. 

The most touching thing was, this is a library book, and someone had underlined the sentences that touched them.  I guess this person was going through a divorce or split with her/his partner.  I felt like these sentences she underlined reassured her that it was ok, and empowered her/him to feel that someone else felt that too.  I felt like she/he was getting some kind of resolve.  When I read the paragraph on someone’s split from their husband, that her husband had cheated on her and declared it, and went with the other woman, the reactions of the woman reminded me of how I felt, when my bf had basically cheating on me, that you know, sheer rage, sadness, anger, and the feeling that you wanted to kill him.  That was normal apparently :).  It just made me kinda happy inside to see that its so normal.  I think I got over it a long time ago in realising that I didn’t want him anyway in the long run, but its good to see that this is a healthy cycle of feeling, to go through all those emotions, including actually feeling that you love him also, in between all the sadness, anger, hate, shock. 

Backpain gets a bit better when I’m relaxed, but it still feels tired.

But I’m glad I’m enjoying the afternoon inside.

 

Note: *Took a nap and feel more refreshed now, making some dinner.