Woke up at 2pm. I slept at, again, sometime in the morning after playing Jewel Quest Solitaire and then deciding, yeah I do need some pain medication still cos my spine was killing me.
So then after that I slept quite well.
But I wake up feeling pretty shitty. Not extremely, but enough to think, “Gee, another day, another meaningless day”, or something like that. Yesterday night I was in a lot of pain, I guess that’s what made me more depressed.
So I was debating whether to take 10mg instead, but I’ll try to keep it consistent and take 5mg for now. I go talk to the nurse next week, so I can still discuss how I feel.
I feel like I’m just trying to escape myself all the time, like dealing with things. It’s a sunny day, I want to go out to see a friend, but everything feels so pointless, as if its just another distraction.
It’s weird that I don’t even see socialising as having a point anymore, I know I (humans) need that.
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